Lakunmi's Chopsticks: Loving Yourself The Right Way
As we say, everyone needs somebody to love them! So true but we also know that a lot of us get into relationships, clueless yet hoping to love that person and be loved by that person. Still, shit happens and things don’t go right, I mean, things just fall apart that you wonder if you ever loved that person or if they ever loved you.
You must have heard people say ‘you have to love yourself to be able to love somebody’. Although Neyo sang the opposite of that, but that’s the musical world, not the real world. If you want to love somebody and love them right, you have to love yourself first and if you already love yourself, you can do a check with the points I have come up with for loving yourself.
TRUST: Do you want to know why this is the first on the list? If you are going to date anyone, you have to trust them. If you don’t trust yourself, how can you trust another? If you cheat people generally, you would expect being cheated by another, your subconscious will always want to double check people. So really, trusting yourself would mean you have to avoid being untrustworthy. Avoid shady deals that could ruin your personal confidence and trust in yourself.
FORGIVENESS: Some people are still beating themselves up over things they did wrong last year. If you can’t stand yourself making any mistakes at all, then you shouldn’t be living. If you are finding it hard to forgive yourself, how would you forgive another person that’s close to your heart? And the truth is, it is normal that you expect so much from someone you share your love with. In fact, you expect them to be the last to mess things up or make mistakes, but then, being close to your heart doesn’t make them super human so they would always make mistakes. They will annoy you faster than anyone else but if you have learnt to forgive yourself easily, forgiving another wouldn’t be a problem.
INDEPENDENCE: You could ask yourself right now? Am I independent? Do I ALWAYS need people or somebody? Can I rely on myself? This is really important, being independent is a major thing in our world today. Some ladies rely on their men and vice versa, for their happiness, financial fitness among others. Most singles feel dead once they aren’t in a relationship. Some people rely so much on their spouse that they let the totality of them into that one person…I mean, how can anyone do that? You know you aren’t perfect, you may even be one of those that say ‘nobody is perfect’, yet you let yourself into another person that’s not perfect? That’s not love, that’s irresponsibility on your part! Independence is like a virtue that everyone should possess because it helps in the long run.
So, enjoy the process of loving you!